Sick Days


 Today, the entire house is sick minus the cats. Boo and Michelle have loads of energy. Gaston is gone at school and all Elskie and I feel like doing is sleeping. We are out of saltines and 7-up. And Juice. And pretty much anything else anyone would need to nurse themselves back to health. I took a bath earlier and practically had to crawl from the bathtub to my bed. I feel so weak. I called Michelle's father because he had left his toothbrush in Michelle's overnight bag. I asked him since he had to come here to retrieve his toothbrush is he'd mind taking me to the store to get some things we needed. He started telling me he didn't think he could because he had to meet a friend to get his books for the term and talk about a study schedule. And that he had to be to work by 3:00 or 3:30. He tried saying that it would take him 40 minutes to get here when in fact, it takes fifteen to get here from PSU. I don't know why it still comes to a surprise to me that his friends and school will always come before Michelle. I don't mind it coming before me anymore. Hell, I'm filing the paperwork for the divorce this week. However, it seriously bothers me that anything comes before his daughter. When he started working at the bookstore they told him that it was a flexible schedule. Besides, it is one's right under the law to miss work when you have a sick kid. I'm sure that Rodney would understand if he was a few minutes late because he had to go to the store. But once again he doesn't have his priorities strait. His priorities will never revolve around his little girl. It will always revolve around his work and social life rather than where it matters most. Michelle constantly tells me whenever I tell her she's going with Kyle that she doesn't want to see him. With the way he treats her, I can't say I blame her.
 In other news, my best friend -whom I'll call Sarin- had a horrible tragedy happen in her family this weekend. Her brother killed himself. I don't know exactly all of the details yet. She had to ID her brother. Sarin thinks that he offed himself because their grandmother who raised them died and he just couldn't handle the grief.
Her and I are trying to make plans to go out together. She told me that if Kyle doesn't follow through with taking me to the store that she may be able to swing by later. Yay. Anyways, I think I am going to try to pick all of this tissue up. I must have used a whole roll last night just on my nose.

 Yesterday Elskie gave me her room and volunteered to sleep in the living room. She had suggested it after I had  mentioned that I think part of the problem with me and Derrick (whom I have affectionately nicknamed Gaston) is that he just doesn't seem to get that I like my privacy in the morning and the fact that I am so used to my privacy and things have been a bit more difficult because of the fact that my bedroom had been the living room I had absolutely no where to escape. She went ahead and told Gaston our plan. He thought it was a silly idea because of the fact that I don't pay rent and Elskie went ahead and told him that she really didn't need that much privacy and really in the end she would be the one with the final say in the whole matter. I just hope this does not prevent conflict further down the road. While I was gone with my mother yesterday and at a job interview for Dick's Sporting Goods Elskie moved everything around. Derrick has not showed me any nasty attitude about the whole thing yet which I am glad for.
 I should be hearing back about the job for Dick's Sporting Goods sometime this week. Applicants are to know by next week if they have a job or not! It's a new store opening so they technically will not be opening until Halloween. In that time we will be working on store set up and training.
 In other news, my father has become a homeowner. I am glad for him naturally. I am a pit peeved though since I was told a few weekends ago that he was going to come up and visit Michelle and I on his vacation. He had all of last week off. This week he will be moving into his new place. He will not be coming to visit us in Portland. I guarantee it. It bums me out a lot. I haven't seen my dad since March. And he's not following through with spending more time with his children and grandchild since Marcella passed away two years ago. In fact, we saw dad more often when Marcella had cancer, was  alive, and dying. We spent just about every holiday with them. And now... he's a Jehovah's Witness and he doesn't celebrate holidays. It's a pity really. Michelle is missing out on my father. I am paying him the respect in being open minded about his faith. However, he was more open minded about mine back before all of this Witness business. I'm trying my best not to be bitter, but it really bugs me when my father seems like he's blowing off his family to save his own ass in the afterlife. Or dare I say it -so he could get some-. Anyways...

 I've noticed random things I have missed since having to the majority of my possessions into storage and having to give the car to my ex (well I didn't have to... the starter was going out and I can't afford to fix that) the things I've actually missed. I've missed my books. My vast variety of books. I'm missed my stereo and blasting music while I play. I miss driving places and blasting music. I miss other things too. Like watching Michelle draw on her easel all day. Anyways, speaking of Michelle she wants some snuggles so I need to stop typing.

Unprepared
 I have this impending feeling looking around at the way things are that many people have not been prepared for this second economic depression in which the media keeps calling a recession for fear that people may go crazy or something. I am not trying to come off as bragging or anything of the sort. However, I feel that since I've been raised my entire life in poverty in felony flats practically that I am prepared for this. I have not emotionaly broke down from my living situation. I am used to living in poverty. There has been stress. But I have not felt completely helpless. I am thankful to my friends whom have let me stay with them with my daughter. My bedroom may be their living room. However we've made it like a room so it's sometimes difficult to tell the difference. It's like living in a studio apartment almost. My friends have been awesome on the most part. There have been a few misunderstandings I think. Or more or less I think it's just because we're in close quarters (three adults, two children, three cats, two bedroom apartment with one bathroom) So we're starting to need space. But we're making do. That's what counts. We have a place to live and food in our bellies.
 Things are slowly looking up. My lovely soon to be ex mother inlaw informed me that if I fill out a waiver that I can get divorced free of charge! YAY!
 I had an interview today for a full time position. I hear back Monday about it. Wish me luck. I have another interview on Monday as well :) I am starting to get more helpful. The rainy cold season is starting here in Portland. My mother was driving me to Michelle's doctor's appointment the other day and it started pissing rain so I stuck my head out the window. It felt nice. . . I have my kitty back. Keep your fingers crossed for me.

 My first client is due next month. Me being on call is fast approaching. I am excited.

Living is St. Johns isn't that bad. It reminds me of SE Portland when I was a kid so I feel comforted by that.